Funny Mother Quotes

Searching for some funny humorous mother quotes and sayings. If yes, now you don't need to search for them anymore. As here I have compiled down some of the funny and humorous quotes about mothers. Just hope you like the quote compilation and able to find something funny to describe your lovely mom.

Funny Mother Quotes and Sayings
Funny Mother Quotes and Sayings

Sweater, n. Garment worn by child when its mother is feeling chilly.
Ambrose Bierce

My mother's menu consisted of two choices: Take it or leave it.
Buddy Hackett

A mother’s love: the sacred relationship of affording a nanny so as to be tolerated as a granny.

The most remarkable thing about my mother is that for thirty years she served the family nothing but leftovers. The original meal has never been found.
Calvin Trillin

Never underestimate the fury of an angry mother, Caspar. They're the most vicious creatures in the world.
Elizabeth Hunter

No one ever died from sleeping in an unmade bed. I have known mothers who remake the bed after their children do it because there is wrinkle in the spread or the blanket is on crooked. This is sick.
Erma Bombeck

When your mother asks, "Do you want a piece of advice?" it's a mere formality. It doesn't matter if you answer yes or no. You're going to get it anyway.
Erma Bombeck

Mothers are all slightly insane.
J.D. Salinger, The Catcher in the Rye

But my mother's life was a never-ending round of maintenance. Not one single thing did she ever achieve but that it had to be done all over again, one day or one week or one season later. Oh, the monotony.
Jacqueline Kelly

Whatever else is unsure in this stinking dunghill of a world a mother’s love is not.
James Joyce

How’s my mom? My mother’s well, like a painting—a Motherwell.
Jarod Kintz

She was a monster, but she was my monster.
Jeanette Winterson

My mother... she is beautiful, softened at the edges and tempered with a spine of steel. I want to grow old and be like her.
Jodi Picoult

Right, except I'm not going to lie to my mom, because what kind of bastard lies to his own mother?
John Green

Mothers possess a power beyond that of a king on his throne.
Mabel Hale

Our mothers always remain the strangest, craziest people we've ever met.
Marguerite Duras

My mother had a great deal of trouble with me, but I think she enjoyed it.
Mark Twain

If evolution really works, how come mothers have only two hands?
Milton Berl

I think all mothers are alike, regardless of cultural background, when it comes to illogical cleaning.
Neal Shusterman

I think being a mother is the cruelest thing in the world.
Nella Larsen

All women become like their mothers. That is their tragedy. No man does. That’s his.
Oscar Wilde

A man's got to do what a man's got to do. A woman must do what he can't.
Rhonda Hansome

I know how to do anythingI'm a mom
Roseanne Barr

Motherhood is when eating chicken soup; the kids get the chicken and you get the soup and you would still feel happily stuffed.
Sandra Chami Kassis

There's nothing like your mother's sympathetic voice to make you want to burst into tears.
Sophie Kinsella

Never argue with a mother who's scolding her child.
Toba Beta

A man’s work is from sun to sun, but a mother’s work is never done.

A mother’s love is not blind, it is just very nearsighted.

I smile because you're my mother. I laughter because there's nothing you can do about it.

Mothers! Even they are wrong, they are right.

Moms! Just smarter than dads.