Funny Work Quotes

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Funny Work Quotes
Funny Work Quotes

If A equals success, then the formula is A = X + Y + Z. Where X is work. Y is play. Z is keep your mouth shut
Albert Einstein

Work: a dangerous disorder affecting high public functionaries who want to go fishing.
Ambrose Bierce

One of the symptoms of an approaching nervous breakdown is the belief that one's work is terribly important.
Bertrand Russel

If you tell the boss you were late for work because you had a flat tire, the next morning you will have a flat tire.
Cannon's Law

mbition is a poor excuse for not having sense enough to be lazy.
Charlie McCarthy

I always arrive late at the office, but I make up for it by leaving early.
Charles Lamb

I've developed a new philosophy... I only dread one day at a time.
Charles Schultz

The average millionaire can't tell you who got thrown off the island last night.
Dave Ramsey

A dreamcatcher works, if your dream is to be gay. (Note: Here Gay means Happy)
Demetri Martin

When a man tells you that he got rich through hard work, ask him: 'Whose?
Don Marquis

Executive ability is deciding quickly and getting somebody else to do the work.
Earl Nightingale

Hard work never killed anybody, but why take a chance?
Edgar Bergen

Be regular and orderly in your life, so that you may be violent and original in your work.
Gustave Flaubert

Find a job you like and you add five days to every week.
H. Jackson Brown, Jr.

When your work speaks for itself, don't interrupt.
Henry J. Kaiser

I've got all the money I'll ever need, if I die by four o'clock.
Henny Youngman

Son, if you really want something in this life, you have to work for it. Now quiet! They're about to announce the lottery numbers.
Homer Simpson

Hard work is damn near as overrated as monogamy.
Huey Long

I like work; it fascinates me. I can sit and look at it for hours.
Jerome K. Jerome

Early to bed and early to rise probably indicates unskilled labor.
John Ciardi

All you need in this life is ignorance and confidence, and then success is sure.
Mark Twain

I didn't have to work till I was three. But after that, I never stopped.
Martha Raye

Work is the curse of the drinking classes.
Oscar Wilde

Work is a necessity for man. Man invented the alarm clock.
Pablo Picasso

The brain is a wonderful organ; it starts working the moment you get up in the morning and does not stop until you get into the office.
Robert Frost

The difference between a job and a career is the difference between forty and sixty hours a week.
Robert Frost

Every day I get up and look through the Forbes list of the richest people in America. If I'm not there, I go to work.
Robert Orben

The taxpayerthat's someone who works for the federal government but doesn't have to take the civil service examination.
Ronald Reagan

Consultants have credibility because they are not dumb enough to work at your company.
Scott Adams

I have not failed. I've just found 10,000 ways that won't work.
Thomas A. Edison

Whenever you are asked if you can do a job, tell 'em, "Certainly, I can!" Then get busy and find out how to do it.
Theodore Roosevelt

A professor is one who talks in someone else's sleep.