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| Funny Aging Quotes |
The older I grow, the more I distrust the familiar doctrine that age brings wisdom.
H.L. Mencken
Age does not diminish the extreme disappointment of having a scoop of ice cream fall from the cone.
Jim Fiebig
As men get older, the toys get more expensive.
Marvin Davis
Forty is the old age of youth, fifty is the youth of old age.
Hosea Ballou
He has a profound respect for old age. Especially when it's bottled.
Gene Fowler
Like everyone else who makes the mistake of getting older, I begin each day with coffee and obituaries.
Bill Cosby
My grandmother started walking five miles a day when she was sixty. She's ninety-seven now, and we don't know where the heck she is.
Ellen DeGeneres
In old age we are like a batch of letters that someone has sent. We are no longer in the past, we have arrived.
Knut Hamsun
An archaeologist is the best husband a woman can have. The older she gets the more interested he is in her.
Agatha Christie
Advice in old age is foolish; for what can be more absurd than to increase our provisions for the road the nearer we approach to our journey's end.
Marcus Tullius Cicero
Old age is a shipwreck.
Charles de Gaulle
Old age, believe me, is a good and pleasant thing. It is true you are gently shouldered off the stage, but then you are given such a comfortable front stall as spectator.
Confucius
Old age is an excellent time for outrage. My goal is to say or do at least one outrageous thing every week.
Louis Kronenberger
A man growing old becomes a child again.
Sophocles
The tendency of old age to the body, say the physiologists, is to form bone. It is as rare as it is pleasant to meet with an old man whose opinions are not ossified.
Bob Wells
The whole business of marshaling one's energies becomes more and more important as one grows older.
Hume Cronyn
The really frightening thing about middle age is the knowledge that you'll grow out of it.
Doris Day
Just remember, when you’re over the hill, you begin to pick up speed.
Charles M. Schulz
No man is ever old enough to know better.
Holbrook Jackson
Old age is like a plane flying through a storm. Once you're aboard, there's nothing you can do.
Golda Meir
Old age is the most unexpected of all the things that can happen to a man.
James Thurber
Middle age is the time when a man is always thinking that in a week or two he will feel as good as ever.
Don Marquis
I'm happy to report that my inner child is still ageless.
James Broughton
In youth we run into difficulties. In old age difficulties run into us.
Beverly Sills
I will never be an old man. To me, old age is always 15 years older than I am.
Francis Bacon
When I was a boy the Dead Sea was only sick.
George Burns
You end up as you deserve. In old age you must put up with the face, the friends, the health, and the children you have earned.
Judith Viorst
You'd be surprised how many people in the modern age no longer fear zombies as much as teletubies.
Sherrilyn Kenyon
